Banks really know how to get me going. I mean – I am not the perfect customer …sometimes things bounce ….once in a blue moon – you know -BUT it could be because they feel the need to control where, how and when I manage MY money.
Account agreements are quite detailed and informative documents that cover legal responsibilities between account holder and account keeper – but the powes that be forgot to add a few notes in the fineprint. Here is an excerpt of that revision:
Once you deposit money into this institution, it is ours. We will LET you take out $300 maximum with any deposit – but the rest will not be available to you until we’ve spent it and can pay you back – that might be about a week or so. Oh and BY the way – depending on your postal code – we sight any deposit over $1000 – as a fraudulent activity and we reserve the right hold ALL funds in your accounts without notifying you if there is a deposit of any amount equaling or above said value. We will charge you to deposit or withdraw your money to purchase items that you will pay taxes on – and earned through hard work and fervent labour. All you have to do is keep giving us all your cash. Our calendar day ends at 6pm – so if you punch out of your job at 6 – or cannot get to one of our machines by then, your money will not be considered deposited until the next day. However if we are withdrawing money for our payments – any day – any time will do. If we say the 15th – that might mean the funds might be withdrawn between midnight the 13th to midnight the 16th (weekends and holidays not included).
We open at around 9ish and close at about 4 and are closed on the weekends with the exception of a few locations where we think those people deserve to have access to in person service. We count your money, we take your money – we lend you money (but only if you have money) AND we make money from your money.
All in all – we are doing YOU a favour by keeping and spending your money for you.
Nice. Where do I sign?
That fine space between my mattress and boxspring is looking better and better each day.
Denise
