In Pursuit of Patience

It was bad enough that I waited for an hour yesterday at the passport office – only to find that I forgot my birth certificate at home AND that the front desk failed to explain that someone who has a passport file online gets an advanced ticket….But after bravely returning there today – I was served the most slimy plate of rudeness than I have been in a while. With a dessert of subtly – of course, just the way those DGAs (Demon Government Agents) like it.  Dealing with that condescending troglodyte left me feeling more vulnerable than the DGA the day before, at least she allowed me a few minutes to plow through my purse – frantically looking for that which would never be found. It was more downtrodden than the feeling of walking away defeated after wasting my entire lunch hour plus $5 worth of gas – and worst yet, on the last day my application could be processed in time for pick up before my trip. 

 I had to wait this long to apply, because before I simply did not have the required funds. So here I was at my most desperate moment trying to make a last ditched effort to complete this sisyphean task – and I had to end up with the most vile of the lot. Although I only had a 2 minute wait – I will forever remember this as one of my worst customer service experiences- ever.  

She greeted me with distaste, “Yes?”

I smiled and told her I was applying for a passport – I handed her the files.

“Date of Travel?”

“April 5^th”

“Can I see your plane ticket?”

Pardon? Ok – they didn’t say this on the website either…

“I don’t have it with me”. Of course she was expecting that – so she went right into her next phrase which she delivered with passion,

“ At this time we are processing documents for April 8^th. That is the earliest time you will be able to receive this. The pick up fee is $10”

I scoffed.

“OR we send it in the mail”  

“I won’t be able to pick up that date – I will be in Washington. Send it in the mail!” I said.

I mean really. Can it get any worse? What’s the point of picking it up? So I try to focus to make sure NOT to miss out on any other possibilities – and ask

“What if I get it express? – Will I be able to get it in time then?”This woman looked at me as if I was climbing the DUNCE tree – then proceeds to sneer at me with a smile –

“How would you file for an express?”

Wait a minute – now I know she must know what I’m talking about so I played along.

“Umm.. Well I thought we could pay to have an express passport – that way –“ oh but she couldn’t wait to deliver the uppercut so she interrupts,

“THAT was why I asked you for a plane ticket.” The following look denoted without words her thought “Which you CLEARLY did not have.”  

I could not believe the sheer rudeness of this woman  - I said nothing for the remainder of the process – and gave her whatever she asked for – all the while wanting to say something REALLY rude.

But it didn’t end there…

I stopped at restaurant to pick up some lunch and seeing as I was asking for take-out – I became a second class citizen. After handing over $6.00 for a few chicken balls and plain rice, the woman turns to me and questions me about my 2 cents change – “ 2 cents is okay, right?”.

UUmmm No. “ I would like my 2 cents thanks “ I answered shocked. She returned with my 2 pennies and told me it would be about 15 minutes.

“Okay” I said, “I’ll wait here”.  Oh but wait – now I’m getting all kinds of choices,

“ You can go and walk around and come back.” She said.  I looked around the EMPTY restaurant and the EMPTY seats in the lobby. At this point I assume I am just put off with my previous experience and without further prompts – I sit down right there in the lobby for my food (which came 5 minutes later). 

As I opened ‘The bridgeless gap” and tried to finish off my reading, I had to remind myself that ‘Sometimes you’re the pigeon, and sometimes you’re the statue.”  And I left feeling good that not only did I complete the task that I set out to accomplish, but I saved $10 in pick up fees and $35 in express charges. After all – I could use that money to pay off the immigration agent to avoid detainment at the border.  

Denise