My hubby picked up a book by a doctor (whose name completely evades me at this moment) – and the title of this book is ‘Becoming Real’. To summarize, the book explores the basis of personality and how our coping measures affect the way we interact with the world. Now I hadn’t intended on expanding the Psychology section of my ‘library’ this year – but you better believe I picked THAT up.
People have always fascinated me. We are so complex and yet is possible to predict our behaviour based on the stable and coherent aspects of our personality. Most of us would like to believe we are different in a way that noone can understand. Well that my friends is not a good sign. IF noone can understand you – then it probably means something is wrong with you. There. I said it. As individual and separate as we are from one another – there are certain behaviours that suggest abnormalities.
These can be due to a number of different factors (Biological, for instance) – but generally speaking it is who you are whether you like the idea of that ‘you’ or not. The key is knowing and accepting the REAL you.
To me, knowing is the awareness of one’s traits.
“Yes – I am temperamental” – you say to yourself
Accepting –requires an adjustment to your attitude regarding how you and others recognize this behaviour and react to it.
“Yes – I am temperamental” – you say to your observer/accuser
Now you can decide whether this trait needs to be adjusted and how it can be done. Why are you ‘tempermental’ Is it biological? Is it learned? Is it a bad habit? How do you unlearn it? Where is the best place to go for help?
Of course the key is that you really have to want to change this behaviour – and you must work to make it happen.
‘Becoming Real’ attempts to dictate how we build the stories that prevent us from sometimes ‘knowing’ and most often ‘accepting’ who we are. It attempts to explain why being one’s true self is a life’s struggle for some of us depending on our personality type and the destructive force it can have on our lives.Have you written a story about your life in order to cope with struggles and trauma? Most of us have – but as we get older tend to look back and see things from a different vantage point. Understanding why our parents behaved the way they did and revising our stories is important. More so, it becomes a learning tool for our future years and a compass for pointing us into the right direction. Whether it’s right or wrong – whether we were the victim or the abuser - becomes irrelevant. One does not need to be one or the other.
So check your life’s compass. If you find yourself heading South – when you should be going West. Don’t keep walking. Sometimes you have to go back where you started. Many times we take shortcuts when the long way is the best way to go.
And if you’ve made it a habit in your life to write your own story – to draw your own map – be careful; if there is no oasis in the desert – don’t draw one there. If you fell off your camel because you could not control it –don’t tell the good Samaritan that you acquired your injury being robbed. How will you ever be able to control that camel if you refuse to embrace the opportunity to learn how to?
Soon – you too will start believing your own stories – and it becomes most difficult to find your way home.
Becoming Real
Tags: friends, life, personality, psychology, psychopathology, social commentary
My hubby picked up a book by a doctor (whose name completely evades me at this moment) – and the title of this book is ‘Becoming Real’. To summarize, the book explores the basis of personality and how our coping measures affect the way we interact with the world. Now I hadn’t intended on expanding the Psychology section of my ‘library’ this year – but you better believe I picked THAT up.
People have always fascinated me. We are so complex and yet is possible to predict our behaviour based on the stable and coherent aspects of our personality. Most of us would like to believe we are different in a way that noone can understand. Well that my friends is not a good sign. IF noone can understand you – then it probably means something is wrong with you. There. I said it. As individual and separate as we are from one another – there are certain behaviours that suggest abnormalities.
These can be due to a number of different factors (Biological, for instance) – but generally speaking it is who you are whether you like the idea of that ‘you’ or not. The key is knowing and accepting the REAL you.
To me, knowing is the awareness of one’s traits.
“Yes – I am temperamental” – you say to yourself
Accepting –requires an adjustment to your attitude regarding how you and others recognize this behaviour and react to it.
“Yes – I am temperamental” – you say to your observer/accuser
Now you can decide whether this trait needs to be adjusted and how it can be done. Why are you ‘tempermental’ Is it biological? Is it learned? Is it a bad habit? How do you unlearn it? Where is the best place to go for help?
Of course the key is that you really have to want to change this behaviour – and you must work to make it happen.
‘Becoming Real’ attempts to dictate how we build the stories that prevent us from sometimes ‘knowing’ and most often ‘accepting’ who we are. It attempts to explain why being one’s true self is a life’s struggle for some of us depending on our personality type and the destructive force it can have on our lives. Have you written a story about your life in order to cope with struggles and trauma? Most of us have – but as we get older tend to look back and see things from a different vantage point. Understanding why our parents behaved the way they did and revising our stories is important. More so, it becomes a learning tool for our future years and a compass for pointing us into the right direction. Whether it’s right or wrong – whether we were the victim or the abuser - becomes irrelevant. One does not need to be one or the other.
So check your life’s compass. If you find yourself heading South – when you should be going West. Don’t keep walking. Sometimes you have to go back where you started. Many times we take shortcuts when the long way is the best way to go.
And if you’ve made it a habit in your life to write your own story – to draw your own map – be careful; if there is no oasis in the desert – don’t draw one there. If you fell off your camel because you could not control it –don’t tell the good Samaritan that you acquired your injury being robbed. How will you ever be able to control that camel if you refuse to embrace the opportunity to learn how to?
Soon – you too will start believing your own stories – and it becomes most difficult to find your way home.
In the words of Ms Lou – ‘Walk good’ ,
Denise